Louie and I were enjoying an evening stroll in our neighborhood and stopped to talk to several neighbors. As we finished one conversation, Louie picked up the pace to continue our walk when suddenly, from out of nowhere, another dog charged him, barking feverishly.
Louie’s first reaction to any threat, real or imagined, is to run as fast as he can. But being on a leash prohibits that reaction, so he resorts to his next natural reaction: to fight. Louie’s hackles went up immediately, and he bared his teeth and growled viciously.
Never mind that the threat was an elderly, twelve-pound pug named Sophie who had gotten loose from her owner. Leash and all, she went after Louie with all her might. I yanked on Louie’s leash and commanded him to stop. But how could I do that when his very life was being threatened (or so he thought)? Sophie’s owner stood back and did not come to the rescue. Here I was telling my dog not to react while hers was loose and giving Louie all she had. When I realized I would not get any help from her owner, I reached down, grabbed Sophie, and in my best imitation of Clint Eastwood, hissed in her ear, “Not with my dog, you don’t!”
I handed Sophie over to her owner, and Louie and I continued walking, a bit out of breath but glad to be away from the nuisance. I was ticked, to say the least. In the heat of the moment, I thought of letting Louie do whatever he wanted to that little Sophie but decided not to allow the situation to escalate. It seemed unfair that I told my dog not to behave badly yet he was the one being attacked.
Oh, gee, wait . . . we do that all the time in our organizations, don’t we? Someone attacks another, and we stand by and watch because the attacker is “harmless” (or so we think). We try to handle the better-behaved employee because they take feedback well and are more apt to listen. Meanwhile, the attacker continues down their path of destruction. Many times, we don’t want to confront the attacker because of the havoc they will wreak. We brush off such poor behavior, reasoning that the attacker either didn’t mean any harm or must have had an issue outside of that they’re struggling to handle. After all, they really are a nice person, right?
Right! Sophie’s an adorable dog unless you’re another dog and happen to be anywhere in her sight!
Now, I know there is a theory about why small dogs think they need to go after larger dogs. I’ve owned a few of those small dogs myself; the most notorious was Cece. My sister, Mary Jo, described her as scrappy. Cece would chase after the Rottweiler down the street. The bigger the dog, the more aggressively Cece would take it on. So embarrassing! But Cece and the small dog syndrome will be the subject of another post.
This post is about how it takes only one person to destroy a team and set it back. Louie was skittish on walks after that incident with one little dog, which seemed to set us back four years to when I first adopted him and he was filled with fear. Sophie behaved poorly, Louie was reprimanded, and we found ourselves back at square one.
By the same token, it takes only one person to
- change a culture;
- influence team members for the greater good;
- cast the vision for a team;
- move a team toward the next part of the journey;
- do the right thing (think of the movie 12 Angry Men);
- confront the office or neighborhood bully;
- model love, kindness, trust, and respect; or
- refuse to give in when faced with what seems like a setback.
Louie and Sophie will never be friends, but he should at least not have to fear her as we walk down the street. In reflecting on this situation, I’ve set out to be that one person who can positively affect others’ lives despite those who do nothing but attack. I encourage you to do the same and perhaps collectively, we can make our world a better place.
Just for fun…
2017 2016
Louie is not a fan of Halloween and costumes!
Hi Danise,
Louie always has such valuable lessons to teach us!
This post reminded me that we often excuse or tolerate a person’s bad behavior because we say, “Oh, that’s just Linda being Linda.”
Well, our personality is not an excuse for bad behavior. And our culture is a result of the behaviors we allow to occur, both good and bad. It’s up to us as leaders to set the tone, model the behaviors we want to see in our team, and to redirect people when they get off track.
Keep up the good work!
Randy
Hi, Randy!
This is such great wisdom. I agree and appreciate the insight into cultivating a great culture. Thank you once again for being such a fan of Louie :-).
Great post, Danise! I also appreciate the feedback from Randy. Both very insightful thoughts in leadership.
Thanks, Jessica!! And I never tire of learning from Randy! He shares great wisdom on his blog, Leading With Trust, https://leadingwithtrust.com/